this post is here because i reallly wanted to write something…. haven’t proofread it. so pardon me for lingual mistakes.don’t read further if you don’t want to waste your time…
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i am no different from others and find it real difficult to follow my new year resolutions. but, this year i have decided that i will stick to them. after-all, it’s my life and i wanna look and feel as healthy as i could.
i will sleep at-least 12 hours every day. you see doc says exercise done in the bed are the best one.
no one-woman-man funda anymore, it was taught just because they couldn’t get multiple partners. while one can get it, one must give it a try. it’s real fun to change your partners like you change cloths. you get to learn a lot. oh, yeah, i know love-shove doesn’t matter. in the end it’s all about friction and recreation.
girls, if you wanna hear… “i was raised on a farm in moooresville, indiana. my mama ran out on us when i was three, my daddy beat the hell out of me cause he didn’t know no better way to raise me. i like baseball, movies, good clothes, fast cars, whiskey, and you… what else you need to know? ”
or
“i don’t exactly know what i am required to say in order for you to have intercourse with me. but could we assume that i said all that. i mean essentially we are talking about fluid exchange right? so could we go just straight to the sex.” then you should dial +91-9590-490-004.
sorry guys, still no plans to swing both ways 
i will follow a strict regime of restricted diet (only deep fried food with extra cheese and toppings, of course everything non-veg). i will eat at-least 10 times every 24 hours. it takes care of my basic needs of sleep,sex and hunger.
oh, yeah, i will drink everyday without fail in 2011. morning – beer, lunch – wine evening – scotch. everyone says you must drink at-least 4 liters every day. so if i miss the quota by some margin, though it would be a rare scene, i will complete it by drinking some water as well.
i have been asked many times whether i smoke or not. i have decided to shut this question forever. in this year, you will always find a ciggerate between my fingers.
i will make sure that i would not run at all, take a cab even for hundred meter distance. no yoga, no swimming and no physical activities. they just keep you wear old cloths, if you gain some weight, it’s a good indication, you get to shop for your wardrobe. after-all, who wouldn’t want a new wardrobe every few months.
i will not take phone calls when i am not drunk, i really talk well when i am drunk.
i will never reach office on time, there is no fun is reaching on time and waiting for others. office meetings are such a waste of time, i will make sure that either i reach after the meeting got over of i reach just before it gets over to save my productive time. i would rather have a couple of drinks on my way to meeting to make sure that i reach there in high sprites and jovial mood. i am sure my appraiser will notice this and will issue me a token of appreciation and obviously a promotion and salary hike comes clubbed to it.
i will make sure that this year neither i will receive calls from my friend’s girlfriend’s nor i will call them myself, when i am drunk. if unfortunately it happens i definitely wouldn’t express my love/desire for them. definitely, i am not gonna tell any of them “i love you”. i will take great care in not reveling to her that her boyfriend is actually cheating on her. i will also not tell her that he shares everything with me. absolutely no, i wouldn’t tell about the adventures or anything else for that matter
i will make sure that i stay away from family and friends as much as possible. yeah, you got it right no plans to get married this year with a or any “haddy (malnutrioned chic)”.
i need to start smoking and get my first official loan from a bank as well. saving money is a bad thing. i will try to be as much un-organized as possible. i will not learn anything new.
“may i help you” and “thank you, sorry, please” etc. would be a scarce statement used by me in the coming year. i will not got for my masters or financial certifications. i will make sure that i stare at people rather then looking away. sheer fun to stare at girls, isn’t it? those curves…ooomph factor
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